Chapter 1


on February 17, 1998, a little girl was born. screaming and shouting at the world as if she was saying I'm here people, I'm alive, strong and powerful, with a voice heard from miles away, I won't be shut down, I won't be quite, I was born to be loud, loud and clear.
and that little strong baby girl was me. 19 years ago; I was born in a big city and a big family, the last of my sisters. one of a kind huh...
my elder sister named me Maroua a name which suits me very well I must say, I love my name very very much.
I was a hyper baby, always jumping around and bumping into things, thinking I'm a full-time warrior in a cartoon, fighting all the evil in the world.
soon enough this happy hyper child changed. I'll tell you how it happened.
one day I was about 1 year old or less, I was crying so hard my face, tongue and hands have turned purple. I also stopped breathing while doing a silent scream and shaking with fury. when mom saw me she was shaken.
she grabbed dad and they took to the neurologist.
the doctor said: " Your daughter has a blocked vein in her head, this vein is responsible for providing blood to the brain so that the brain functions properly."
since that day my childhood changed. I was taking meds 3 times a day every day, and there was no room for error. for example, if my mom forgot to give me my meds at the proper hour the doctor will give a really hard time.
and of course, mom had to take me to the doctor once every three months for an EEG scan; which is a test used to find problems related to electrical activity of the brain.
this thing lasted for 6 years until one day someone recommended a better doctor to my mom.
so she and I went to his office, explained the past 6 years briefly. after that, he went on and started diagnosing me. when the diagnosis ended he said to mom: " your daughter is perfectly healthy there is nothing wrong with her, and the incident that started all this is a completely normal thing for babies. now, for the medicine she is taking; I can't cut it all out at once, we are going to minimize the doses, step by step until she's off meds for good."
and that was the beginning of something different.

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