Chapter 1


i smile to my phone more than to real people
i listen to music more than I talk to anyone
i stumble more than I walk straight
my knees are weak
my head is dizzy
i have this endless noise in my ears
everything is so loud
everything is so silent
everything is so sharp
or everything is so blurry
i wear glasses
i don't own any white trainees
i don't own any merch t-shirts
i don't have perfect skin
my attitude is pretty depressing
my brain is messy
i don't wanna do anything
i've never been in love
and i've never been loved
i'm far from romantic person
i don't like to cuddle
i don't play guitar and know zero chords
i don't like love themed talks
i like warm evenings and the smell of a coffee
i can't seat in park on a grass
i don't drink or smoke
i'm just tired
tired of living and wasting the air
my jeans are ripping
my apples are ending
i drink very strong coffee and then have a chest pain
i can't stop talking about tv shows or music
no one can understand me and I can't understand them
it's just me
and I hate myself

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